I only killed one PC with this dungeon. Your turn...

Here kids, have a system-agnostic dungeon. This is the one the girls just escaped...

(Believe it or not, the obvious-if-you-just-look-at-the-map cunnilingual motif was an accident produced by randomly rolling monsters...)

Cathedral Of All Flesh Notes & Stats

This is an abandoned stone cathedral on a hill overlooking the edge of the rugged and inhospitable area known as The Bleak.

It is shaped like four enormous, many-eyed goats leaning together like sticks in a campfire, struggling toward the sky. The exterior is pitted and cracked.

Roughly rectangular rooms have been carved inside into what appears to be solid rock. There are no windows. The cathedral was built by devotees of Tittivila, Goddess of All Flesh before the church of the Insect God drove them from the Hackleth Isles during the War of Golems. The Insect Priests who dominate Hakleth have declared it a forbidden place.

Its appearance is so terrible that no-one who can see it clearly can approach within 30 yards--as such, it can only be approached blindly or at night.

A corrupt Tittivilan cult from the East--lead by the insane cleric, Pearl Viper, uses the Cathedral as a secret meeting place.

Each night of winter, she summons the Orth--an inscrutable extradimensional creature--into a sacred circle on the roof of the Cathedral and commands it to slay random inhabitants of Hakleth in the night. She is accompanied by her servant, Otto, an illusionist. The ritual begins each night at sundown and goes until to midnight, at which point the Orth is summoned and begins to seek victims.

The local authorities have installed a sentinel in a small watchtower--30' high--a few hundred yards from the hill, to keep an eye on both the Cathedral and the pass out of The Bleak. The sentinel is dutiful and carries a small telescope.

The cathedral is rumored to contain fabulous wealth. Also, naturalist Myria Essik of the Isle of Oth is offering 12000 gp to any party who can bring the Orth back to her alive and 4000 gp to anyone who can bring all of it back dead.

Plying the locals for information will reveal most of these things and uncover a rumor that one man claims to have driven if off with fire and another claims it was invulnerable to fire.

The adventure as written is suitable for a party of 3-5 adventurers levels 2-4, however it is easily scalable-there's no particular reason the foes couldn't be made more or less powerful.

-If a party should enter the Cathedral, be noticed, and then retreat, Viper will send Otto to follow them--and kill them if necessary. She will also then hire six mercenaries to protect her for the next week--five will attempt to seize control of the watchtower and one will roam the cathedral while she performs her rites each night.

-Note disabling the trap in room 17 requires simultaneously flipping the switches in rooms 10 and 4.

-Assume all nonhuman creatures attack and fight as typical fighters of a level equal to their hit dice. Any details not given here can be made up by the DM--for example how much of Pearl Viper's armor class is down to her talisman.

Orth (A tentacled thing from beyond) HD: 14 AC: 18 or 2 Speed: 3/4 human Intelligence: Animal
Attack: 5 tentacle attacks for d8 each. An unmodified "to hit" roll of 17 or above indicates the target is grappled and can be automatically bitten by the central maw for d8 points of damage the next round unless the target makes a successful escape roll on his or her next turn (using whatever your local mechanic for that is--assume the Orth's strength is 16 per tentacle).
Defense: All forms of attack damage the Orth, but the Orth will always be immune to the last form of attack it was successfully hurt with. For example: if it is attacked with steel, it will be hurt but then be immune to steel until it is attacked with (say) fire, in which case it will once again be vulnerable to steel but invulnerable to flame.

Pearl Viper (Cleric, level 6) HD: 6 AC: 19 or 1 (magic talisman + dexterity) Speed: human Intelligence: 15
Attack: Spiked chain for d6 or by spell. Her unusual spells include:
Choking Garment-Single target's clothes begin to choke him/her for d8 damage per round. Strength roll required to tear off collar. No save. Range: 20'
Defense:
-Prismatic Denial -Caster becomes immune to attack from anything of a chosen color and anyone wearing that color. Only one Prismatic Denial may be in effect on a given caster at any time.
-Runic Prisoner-Range: 20' Area of effect: 15' diameter circle Save allowed. Prevents targets from performing whatever their last action was until caster is slain. Attacking with an axe is considered different from attacking with a sword, for example, but running north is considered the same as running south. DMs judgment is required here.
-Note: Once per day, Viper may teleport without error within 200 feet by emerging from a shadow and then he may disappear into the same shadow and return from whence she came the next round after taking one action. You may fill the rest of her spell list with the number of spells appropriate to a cleric of her level in your system.

Otto (Wizard/Illusionist, level 5) HD: 5 AC: 17 or 3 (dex) Speed: human Intelligence: 16
Attack and defense: To keep things simple, just assume Otto has 2 spells, each of which he has prepared 3 times-- One allows him to create illusions that affect one person within 40' who saves at minus 2 and one that allows him to create illusions that affect everyone within a 40' radius--all of whom get an ordinary save. The illusions have visual and auditory components but he must save to maintain them if he takes damage. If you know your illusion rules backward and forward you can have the spells behave as they should in your system, if you don't assume, they otherwise behave as above and make judgment calls.

Lingua Necrotica (or Plague Tongues--rotting pale creatures 3-4 feet tall) HD: 3 AC: 16 or 4 Speed: human Intelligence: non-
Attack: Their touch does d4 damage and (failing a save) transmits an unspeakable disease. This malady causes the sufferer to be seized with the desire to lick the nearest living being. A successful grapple causes a network of thin yellow filaments to spouts from the sufferer's skin, attaching the plague victim to the unfortunate target of his or her affections. If left unbroken, these growths will eventually grow together into a viscid cocoon connecting and entombing both parties and transforming them--over the course of days--into a new cohort of lingua.

Clockwork Needlebirds (Small brass birds with syringes for heads) HD: 1 AC:15 or 5 Speed: 1.25 x human Intelligence: Animal
Attack: A successful "beak" attack does d4-1 damage and puts the target to sleep for d6 rounds if they fail to save. There is only enough juice for one full attack per bird. Subsequent attacks only do damage.

The Hive Demon (A creature entombed in ages past by the Insect Cult, to be awoken should the Cult of All Flesh return to the temple), if awoken, should be rolled on this table: http://dndwithpornstars.blogspot.com/2011/09/demonic-attribute-table.html The DM may roll this creature in advance but I recommend having a player roll during the game (to watch the creature take shape). The DM should keep the results of the ability rolls secret. Otherwise the creature should have the following stats:
HD: 12 AC: 0 or 20 Speed: human intelligence: 17
It will be wreathed in a halo of flies. It will be attempt to slay any living thing in its path other than a cleric of the Insect Cult.

Mercenaries (Hired by Pearl Viper if she becomes aware of the PCs-they are Level 4) HD: 4 AC: 18 or 2 (splint mail, shield, high dex) Speed: human Intelligence: 10
Attack: light crossbow, net or longsword

Diseases, Dungeons, Bookbinding, Alcohol, Bestiaries, etc.

-First, A Picture

-Then, two public service announcements:

-Jim Ward--as in Drawmij's Instant Summons--needs help. Hook him up if you have a buck.

-You guys like miniatures right? This one's called Sasha and fights cancer:

Get an exclusive 28mm miniature and help combat Cancer and MS. Full details here:

http://frothersunite.com/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=36069

and on Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Frothers-Charity-Thingy-2012/239388002780960

-Now, a picture from some Danish guy's house that I think is funny:

-Noisms asked us all some questions:

Book binding. I presume I speak for like a gazillion gamers when I say I'd like to have my RPG books bound well and would not like to read thousands of blog posts about how RPG books should be bound well.

"Doing a voice". Ding.

Breaks. I have a break if someone has to take a phone call anyway and we're not in the middle of something. I also have a break if a major objective just got finished and so we might keep going or we might just stop and hand out xp--figure out after the break.

Description. Ding.

Where do you strike the balance between "doing what your character would do" and "acting like a dickhead"? When I'm playing I generally just ask "Is that ok?" to the other PCs. When I'm running the game--the few times it comes up--it's a question of knowing the individual player well enough to know how disruptive they can get and knowing how to communicate with that specific person.

PC-on-PC violence. Aside from Mandy's brother, most of my players know each other and are socialized enough to at least know how far to push it. And with Mandy's brother it's just funny because there's a whole big-sister little-brother dynamic going on.

How do you explain what a role playing game is to a stranger who is also a non-player? I don't explain RPGs to strangers.

Alcohol at the table? On a 5 or a 6. My players' PCs tend to act exactly the same whether they're drunk or not, so far as I can tell. The only difference is they have an excuse when they can't remember NPCs from the session before.

What's acceptable to do to a PC whose player is absent from the session? I just have the PC disappear and be carried off to fairy land while nobody's looking.

-Now, a dungeon:
(click to enlarge)



-And finally, an observation that could probably be its own post but whatever:

Monsters. The monster bestiary in a published game book (if the game is D&D-like) isn't just things the PCs fight or things that define the setting: they are also a reason PCs care about leveling up and going on with the campaign.

Some players want their PCs to acquire power or wealth or status, but I think a lot of them leaf through the Monster Manual and see Asmodeus and go: I wanna meet that guy. And I want to be tough enough to beat him. And I want to have earned it,

Game-defining monsters like the dragons in Shadowrun or D&D or the beholder or the demons in Warhammer give the PCs the constant unconscious feeling that there's more out there in the game.

Games which don't have that, or game genres that don't have that--I think they need something else to keep PCs on the hook. Like I can see being playing a cowboy for a session or two--but why keep going? What am I gonna see in the 80th Boot Hill adventure that I didn't see in the first? Or, rather: what do I unconsciously anticipate that I am going to see in the 80th Boot Hill adventure that I didn't see in the first?

So having a sort of "public" awareness of the monsters in your game--so public even your players know these monsters--is a useful thing. The value of that has to be weighed against the "all-unknown-monsters-create-mystery" thing.

Put On Your Beret, Light A Gauloise, And Here We Go...

The...

(circle one)
problem with / awesome thing about

...classic D&D is it's not focused around any one way of playing.

So I was walking around Montreal today, where everything is French, and I realized that the frequent inability of the garage rockers of DIY D&D and the prog rockers of story-games and other forms of aggressive new-schoolery to understand what each other are on about isn't just a philosophy of gaming thing. It's a philosophy thing. A French philosophy thing, to be specific.

I know, I know, but trust me. Trust me. You trust me, right? Hold on...

So:

The Han vs. Luke issue points it up: Han is the Old School character whose heroism is basically incidental, whereas Luke has an epic heroic destiny from birth since his dad and the Force is strong with him and all that. The whole story is wrapped up with Luke the way Hamlet is wrapped around Hamlet.

Luke's dilemma has the symmetry, structure and choices of classic drama, Han's adventures (or the ones we imagine he has) are more picaresque.

_____

So what Han is is an Existential character. Big "e".

We don't have to go into all the ins and outs of existentialism in this post on this blog about D&D, what's important here is:

It reached the height of its popularity around World War II when Jean Paul Sartre gave it it's most recognizable-to-us form and it was basically a philosophy that caught on in an environment where everybody was asking:

Hey, there are Nazis, what do we do?

So the idea is people are defined by their actions. You aren't your stats, you're what you choose to do with those stats. Existence precedes essence, as Sartre said. You don't have any "essential nature" aside from that which you've done. I very purposely--more and more so every time I do a script--give characters no back story. The way you find about these characters is by watching what they do, the way they react to stress, the way they react to situations and confrontations. In that way, character is revealed through drama rather than being explained through dialogue as Walter Hill said. Character background is what happens between levels 1 and 6, as Gary Gygax said.

More importantly--for this point I'm making here--than actually being sure of all the ins and outs of the philosophy is just being aware that certain aesthetic ideas were attached to the word "existential" in the public mind: The lone figure in a landscape, cowboy movies, bold abstract paintings, lone heroism. Individualism, too, to some degree.

Likewise we don't have to get into the real guts and history of the next philosophy to leach its way into the public consciousness over the course of the 20th century: post-structuralism (aka deconstructionism). We just have to know about it's pop version.

Basically post-structuralism was a philosophy developed while people were all asking the question:

Well, ok, those Nazis were bad, right, but can we be all smug and say we're not like them? No, they were products of an environment. How do we make the environment not produce Nazis?

The post-structuralist big idea is that everybody is enmeshed in social structures and they are affected by them and (according to some of them. anyway) there is no acting or thinking outside these structures and ideologies.

The pop version of post-structuralism is basically heavily associated with critiquing every cultural product from prison architecture to zombie movies from the point of view of how they might eventually make people act like Nazis. Some of these folks are lovely people and smart and clever, some of them are the kind of drooling submentals who call themselves progressives but still wish you would stop drawing boobs.

Post-structuralist aesthetics emphasizes groups, social behavior, the collective.

(Note every argument about edgy art in games seems to devolve to: "What's good for most people" vs. "Your right to like, make, or promote something without being considered a Nazi". Note both of these philosophies--like most philosophies that catch on with large groups of creative people--are generally philosophies of the left. They boil down to a more paternalistic left vs. an anarchistic one. Also: since we're talking about culture and not politics, and so the question isn't: What should the laws be? they're: What constitutes good art or good fun? these positions don't map cleanly onto existing nameable political divisions.)

________

To existentialists, art and things like art are, at most, a means to an end (the end usually being encouraging folks to hang Mussolini from a meathook or understand the nature of freedom) or an expression of what people are like. To post-structuralists, art and things like art are much more important: as important as art is to conservatives and traditionalists--and for the same reason--art is a thing that influences your behavior whether or not you want it to.

The same goes for rules: the existentialist sees rules as one more thing you might have to ignore or get past or weigh as the price of doing what needs done. To post-structuralists, rules create mental structures that influence people in subtle ways.

So: D&D.

On the surface level, the difference between existential and postmodern aesthetics is obvious in the actual games:

90% of what goes on in White Wolf games makes no sense outside a complex social context and social pressures, Dogs In The Ohmygodyou'replayingagameaboutMormons is entirely about seeing the social grid as an interesting and influential environment in itself, Type IV defines roles and teamwork more powerfully than any other combat game I know of.

Meanwhile, in classic D&D, beyond "never split the party" (whether issued for the DM's convenience or the PCs' survival), classic D&Ders as a group have no particular shared conception (that is--no conception they could all agree on across the DIY D&D world) of how the PCs should or shouldn't fit into a larger social context--how the PCs fit with each other or with the gameworld. It's a game full of tombs no-one else has picked over and clerics without congregations. (And the post-structuralist Newie would say that's because the rules don't suggest it, and the DIYer would say Well if I wanted to have my priest have a flock I could. And they are both right, they just care about different things.)

There's the question of freedom and creativity. To the DIYer freedom is the freedom of the PC to make the choice in the game and define the PC through those midlife choices (not through decisions made before the PCs "born"), to the Newie freedom is the freedom to define the nurture or the nature that decides which questions get asked in the first place--Sir Chauncey Middleton Paladin-Ackeworth probably won't ever have to make the whole steal-bread-to-feed-his-family choice. Both narrative control and extensive character building tools are about deciding the kind of story/genre structure you want you game to operate in.

The Newie seems to say: let's have a tale of ____ and ______. The Old Schooler says: whatever you've got, hit me, and we'll find out what I'm made of.

________________

But this is all surface--there are many exceptions to these "rules". The biggest difference is in how the games are designed and how people evaluate these game designs:

The DIY D&Der will tell you that you can pretty much do anything with classic D&D.

The most important words here are "you"--that is, any individual, and "can"--that is, it is possible.

New schoolers will tell you that most people tend to do certain specific things with classic D&D.

The most important words here are "most people"--meaning, the community, the average consumer, the guys at your FLGS who answer the ads--and "tend to"--that is, what activity is encouraged.

To put it another way: DIY D&Ders are judging the game based on what can be done with it and judging it rad. The new schoolers are judging it based on what the social collective has, as a group, done with it, and finds it wanting.

The DIYers pull obscure games apart for their useful parts, the Newies judge famous or milestone games in terms of their impact.

(Not irrelevant: in the System Does Matter essays that were so important to the Forge, Ron Edwards talks a lot about disappointments caused by gaming with random people who had different ideas about how games should work--at conventions, etc. That is: the overall. Whereas in these blogs, people tend to talk about how this group or that group, specifically, worked or did not work. That is: the possible.)

That's why you see New School people writing articles saying "In truth, most old school games I've seen tend to..." and, if you're a DIY D&Der, you immediately scratch your head and go "Why would anyone care how most games tend to end up?"

DIY D&Ders don't care what the rules or the artwork or the setting suggest, they care what can be done with them. Newies ask: take away the rules, artwork and setting and what's left?

The question is how much communicating needs to be done by the game itself, as opposed to by actual human gamers.

Seen through this lens, the otherwise incomprehensible debate about James Raggi's version of D&D that I linked to at the beginning of this post becomes easier to understand. Why does this game have rules for investing in real estate and prices for 17 different kinds of boats if it's about Weird Fantasy? Because it's not really a Weird Fantasy Role Playing Game by your definitions, Newie. It's a game that is supposed to be able to do everything over the course of a loooooooong campaign, just like D&D does, but be Weird a little more often and maybe a little easier to run.

Newies imagine a world where you choose Weird Fantasy Role Playing off a shelf with every game in the world on it because tonight you want to grapple with the dilemmas specific to a world of Weird Fantasy. DIYers are imagining you'd get Weird Fantasy Role Playing off a shelf with 30 other flavors of D&D on it because during your next 90 weeks of throwing yourself up against D&D you'd like to push the Weird a little more than you did in the last 90.

The Newies tend to be obsessed with creating rulesets that will result in Exactly The Right Buttons Getting Pushed for anybody who buys it, no matter how dumb they are, whereas the D&Ders tend to focus on outlier customizations of their own game that they know might only apply to a tiny handful of campaigns.

The DIY D&Ders don't really care what the game (a device for communicating with a collective) is about, they care what the GM (a device for communicating one-on-one with a small group) is about and about creating repositiories of possibilities for all games. LOTFP can be seen in this way as not so much a new game as an attempt to export practices associated with the D&D GM known as James Raggi to your table.

The Newies appear to want a thousand different games that will each communicate transparently what they're about to anyone whereas the Old Schoolers seem to want one game that is specifically tailored to the very precise needs of their own single group and yet has the flexibility to go on and on and on with that group in an ever-changing campaign forever, being about whatever the group wants it to be about until they finally get to be 60 years old and kill Orcus.

Why is Carcosa or Plansescape a hack for D&D and not just a whole new game about whatever Planescape or Carcosa are about? Because then you can make one single campaign that's Vanilla and then Carcosa and then Vanilla and then Planescape and then Eberron and then Dark Sun and then d20 Stormbringer and then Vanilla and then whatever on and on forever.

So: A million rulesets that do one thing each, aimed at a million gaming groups, or one game that only works for one group but allows it to do a million different things.

Ex-Flumph Attacks Actress, Thwarted By Dwarf In Airport Bar

Notes from yesterday's game:

-I went to all the trouble of converting the Midkemia "Where's your PC been during that session s/he missed?" table to an easier-to-use format and used it but it seems kinda dull, really. I've switched to using the "Lost In Faerie" table from The Great Pendragon Campaign.

It consists of a What you were doing in Fairyland section, with stuff like:

1-3 ...captured by giants and forced to cook their hideous provender.

and a Why you're back section with stuff like:

13-14 He hid from their mocking laughter

(Rules in many Pendragon books assume the PCs are male knights. Even stranger, they assume you are using their rules to play Pendragon. What Greg Stafford doesn't know won't hurt him though, I figure.)

It's also better at explaining how the PC disappeared after killing a squid four weeks ago and just now turned up in a 12' x 14' room: she took a wrong turn and goat-horned sprites crawled out of the walls and took her away--then she ran off and said There's No Place Like Whatever Hellhole My Friends're In and Taaa-Daa we're back.

Me: "...and you returned because...d20..."

Kimberly Kane: "4"

"The elves thought you ugly or uncouth."

"I hate elves."

"Which is weird because you're half-elf."

"Yeah, I'm a self-hating half-elf. That's why I drink."

-While KK's barbarian was lost in Faerie and forced to sing for the elves in exchange for their scorn, the real actual KK (who can, oddly enough, be seen above on the lead singer of Aerosmith's shirt) was on some webcam porn site and forced to play Magic: The Gathering for money.

"The guy was nice and trying real hard to make it fun for me but I was just like What? There's no story, it's just cards? Can't I just make you cum? But I beat him though."

-Yeah I lost my dog and wrote a blog post about it and swore revenge. Kimberly's dog is just called "Sueno #5". Or, was. Until that mechastirge trap. Can't remember if they healed it or whether we're on Sueno #6 now.

-So they're going through this temple dungeon and they find the scriptorium--they spend a half hour looking at the books. So I rolled on the 100 random books table. Got "architecture-history" and "demonology". Which, the way I see it, if you're looking through a temple trying to find a demon is about as good as you can roll. Of course this book explains how temples like this are usually laid out. Of course this book has a ritual you can use in it...

-Not that it did anyone any good. They barricaded themselves in the book room and waited for the monster to come to them and the wizard died of a self-inflicted stab wound trying to hustle up some blood to compelte the ritual to control the atrocious Orth...

-The nice thing about tentacle monsters with five attacks is you get to use your random hit location dice. "It has you by the right arm and...right leg". It would've killed Connie (desperately smoking the charm cigarettes she got last week to no good end) had Mandy not run over and caused serious wounds.

-Likewise causing serious wounds was Darren's dwarf.
Look at his jetset shit:
-everyone spends an hour looking through the dungeon without him
-the monster attacks and Connie gets 20'ed by it and it's chewing on CP's head
-Darren suddenly pops up in videochat from the airport bar in Portland or something (escaped from Fairyland, I guess), fights the monster, delivers the killing blow
-then he gets on his plane, leaving everyone else to sort out getting the monster back to town and sailing home

One of your maskier cities...

(click to enlarge)
PC map.DM's map.

Addendum:

People sometimes ask about these maps. I usually use them as "back up" maps for locations I haven't fully fleshed out yet. Like: need a city? Here's one.

It is way easier to make and less useful than a normal map, but good if you have a headache and 15 minutes to kill. And you can build on what you have later.

But since people ask, here's a short tutorial:

1.Google image search a "large" picture. Like I generally google "map medieval" or "floorplan" or something and just look around til I find something big enough to fill on the screen.

2.Find it, download it. I open it in a program that's on all recent Macs called "preview". Look at the file size.

3. Make a new, all-white file that's a few inches bigger than that one in every direction.

4. Cut the original picture and paste it in.

5. Now just google words that fit the mood of your campaign. The above map came from things like "medieval mouth""creepy head" "stone face" "masked weirdo". In fact: everybody's tripping over themselves to figure out how to create a "weird fantasy atmosphere"--just google "weird monster".

6. Download the pictures you like or which make you think clearly of some thing.

7. "Cut" them from their own files, "Paste" them into the new file, (in preview, it lets you adjust the size of the image as you do this--most other programs do too)

8.Preview has a button labelled "annotate". Hit it. Some new options will appear at the bottom of the screen, including: arrows, text boxes, color, line thickness, and font size. Pick an arrow color and draw some arrows (if they're the wrong size, adjust the line thickness option a few clicks down) Put in text if you want. The text function on Preview is idiotic but a little experimenting will allow you to figure it out.

9. Save it as a JPEG. Be careful: preview keeps each individual element (arrows, text) movable and selectable until it's saved. If you don't save it right, a lot the work you did on top may disappear.

Starry Wisdom

1. Discuss:

I was never totally sure why everyone wanted to be Han Solo. Maybe it was because he wasn’t born into it, like Luke, with the birthright and the natural talent for the Force and the premade story. Solo had to make his own story. He was a freelance protagonist, a relatively ordinary guy who got to the major leagues by being quick with a gun and a joke. He was, basically, a hero because he was funny.

(-From How To Live Safely In A Science Fictional Universe by Charles Yu)(A good book)

w/r/t: (pick at least one or make up your own)

Existentialism
Sandbox hero v. plot fiat hero
3d6-in-order
Taking gaming seriously v. not
"Actually the real reason is..."


2. (Extra credit) (quote continues...)

Discuss:

Whatever the reason, first place was always Solo, always, always, always, and second place was usually Chewbacca, because if you weren't the one saving the galaxy, you might as well be eight feet tall and covered with hair.

w/r/t: (pick at least one or make up your own)

Gonzo players
"Kitchen-Sink"
Heroism v. weirdism

3. (extra extra credit) Considering your answers to (1) and (2), explain about Boba Fett.

It really tied the hovel together

Blogger ate my original post after I wrote it, so here's a very short version of the actual play report:

Satine Phoenix (behind a chair, long story), Connie, and Caroline Pierce...
go into the snowy marsh to find the foxwitch...(oh and blogger how much do I have to type so that the formatting won't stick Caroline behind the Keith Parkinson picture down there? This much? this much? More than that? I don't really understand or want to right now I have to go to the store and get this coconut bliss ice cream from the store for Mandy so just let me knwo when I can... Ok, right so anyway into the Hagwood to find the foxwitch...(like that only more fox-er.)

The foxwitch sleeps CP and Satine and they wish the party cleric was there but she's sick in bed so cleric heal thyself..."Oh no I'm sick and not actually eating sushi like I am in this picture" says the cleric.


So the muscle of the party is gone and the thief is the only one left. This could be a total party kill.

So then anyway the foxwitch begins to install str 17 Satine and Str Caroline underneath her small stone house in with the phalanx of other exhausted women under there who are all doing the Atlas thing holding the foxwitch's house out of the marsh and keeping it from flooding and so her carpet being ruined.

Connie then decides to throw a sling stone at the women holding up the house.

This works and causes the house to pitch forward and the foxwitch has to wake up Satine to help her hold the place up.

But then Connie 20s the foxwitch in the back with a mace and runs inside the house to try to drag the carpet into the mud.

Foxwitch freaks, follows.

This then causes considerable strain on the women holding the house up.

CP wakes up.

Things become increasingly confusing.

Satine fires a crossbow into the melee and the witch dies with a bolt through her neck.

They manage to get all but four of the women out from under the house before it collapses--they might've gotten more if Connie hadn't stayed inside to loot it.